Pain.

The very definition of the word had lost all meaning as agony rolled ever through him. He could not move, could not see, could not react in any way except for the occasional scream that built in his lungs and forced its way out violently. Over and over, again and again, as if everything within him were being burned away repeatedly, seared into nothingness, only to be regenerated and burned again. The anguish flickered and danced, changing and mutating with each pass so that he wasn’t given the chance to grow used to it.

Beyond that he was only aware of a constriction closing in around him, encasing him, keeping him prisoner. It almost felt as he imagined a buried coffin might - small . . . confining . . . airless . . . complete with the horrible shrieking knowledge that there was no chance to escape. Within his mind, he screamed when his body could not, screamed with a dead terror, one that was chilling and scarring him to the very depths of his being, one that was made of nothing but hopeless desperation.

It wasn’t stopping . . . the pain was going on and on . . . bringing him to a teetering point where he was certain that he could stand no more, only to discover that he had to. Had to . . . had to . . . His far distant chi shuttered and quaked within its new home, displaced and disconnected. There was no refuge there. The emotional trauma he was projecting had to seek another sanctuary . . .

Ryoga’s pain and terror went outward . . . directionless . . . searching . . . searching until it found a receptive soul .

************************************

"Son-in-Law! Pay attention!"

Ranma yelped and winced as Cologne’s cane found the top of his head again. Furious, he turned on the old woman and did a pretty fair impression of Soun Tendo’s demon head as he shouted. "Damnit! Stop that, or I’ll take that cane of yours and shove it - - "

"Ranma." Dr. Tofu’s steadying hand fell heavily on the pig tailed boy’s shoulder and his slender fingers squeezed just hard enough that Ranma was forced to remember himself and his admittedly poor manners. The four other young people in the room stared at him for a long moment, all startled by his hostile outburst. Akane and Ukyo exchanged uneasy glances.

Trembling, Ranma settled himself, pulling out from under Tofu’s hand and crossing his arms. "Yeah yeah," he muttered in a faintly apologetic tone. "Whatever."

The Amazon matriarch didn’t seem too concerned or surprised. She just rolled her eyes and hopped up onto one of the clinic’s examination tables to put herself at an even level with her most difficult student. "What distracts you, boy?" she demanded sternly.

Ranma turned away from her, slapping an angry pout firmly onto his face. He wasn’t sure how he could explain the distant feelings of terror and agony that had been thrumming in his head for quite some time now, but he knew that they originated with Ryoga. Something was happening . . . something bad . . . something which was the end result of what had occurred this morning, when Ryoga reacted strangely to Ranma’s mention of his mother. Somehow . . . Ranma knew that everything had changed. And whatever was going on now . . . it was hideous. He could plainly feel shadows of the pain that Ryoga was currently suffering . . . shadows that hurt and tore him apart from the inside, despite how insubstantial they actually were.

Ryoga was screaming . . . screaming in agony . . .

Ranma curled his hand into a tight fist. (( She’s doing it again . . . using his chi against him, using it to hurt him . . . but this time she’s not stopping! It just keeps hurting and it’s not stopping! I’m gonna kill her, I swear I am gonna fucking kill her! ))

"This is taking too long!" Ranma snapped, whirling back toward Cologne. "I thought you had some plan for bringing this bitch down, so what are we doing -here-?!" He gestured wildly at Dr. Tofu’s exam room around them.

"I was just getting to that before I noticed your lack of attention, boy." Cologne sniffed importantly, her small eyes glittering. "Listen to me, Ranma. Whatever is happening there - you must put it out of your mind. Concentrate on what we have to teach you. I know you want to go running off to challenge her, but if you do so without focus, then she will beat you easily. Now, pay attention."

Mollified, Ranma took a deep shaky breath and tried to shove Ryoga’s pain down away where it wouldn’t be able to distract him. It was so very hard to ignore that ongoing agony, but he tried his best, whimpering a silent apology to the Lost Boy as he did. (( I’m sorry Ryoga, but she’s right. If I’m gonna beat the bitch, I gotta keep my mind on what’s going on. But I’ll be there soon. I promise. Hold on . . . ))

Cologne eyed him critically, then nodded. "Better."

"Why we here then, Obaba?" Shampoo asked from her ready position nearby. Mousse stood beside her, and had been staying close to her ever since the evening before, but she didn’t seem to mind.

"I contacted an associate of mine late last night after you three left the Nekohanten," Cologne began, inclining her head toward Ranma, Akane and Ukyo. "She did a bit of research into the Shikome and got back to me this morning with some documentation and history concerning the race. Rather fascinating, actually, but I won’t go into details now, as it seems we may be more pressed for time than I originally thought."

Everyone looked startled. "What?" Ukyo asked for all of them. "What do you mean?"

"Last night I mentioned that the Shikome do not normally inhabit the physical reality on a regular basis, do you remember?" the elderly Amazon asked. After receiving anxious nods from the five young people, she continued. "Now, I thought that her failure to take Ryoga to her own realm was a mistake on Ikioi’s part, but I was wrong. She hasn’t taken him there yet because the way is currently closed to her. Accounts speak of a Seal that each Shikome must break, once she has her first Host, in order to join her race. A . . . rite of passage, if you will. Though apparently she hasn’t yet, it can be only a matter of time before the girl breaks this Seal and enters her own realm. If she takes Ryoga there, we will not be able to follow. He will be lost."

"Oh no," Akane breathed softly, putting one hand to her mouth.

Ranma fought with his panic again, pushing it as far down into his gut as he could, and letting a righteous anger take its place. Barely in control, he snarled out an order. "Then tell us what we gotta do, Old Ghoul! Now! Before it’s too late!"

"Calm yourself, Son-in-Law. If you are getting emotional signals from the boy, as it seems you are, then he’s not gone yet. Don’t worry, I have no intention of losing one of my most promising students." Cologne assured, with a rather uncharacteristic show of praise and affection toward Ryoga. "Now listen carefully. The Shikome are not corporeal beings, they exist outside the realm of matter, so they can not be defeated with physical attacks. Fought - yes. Defeated - no. They are creatures of life energy . . . of chi and ki, therefore they must be faced with a ki attack."

"Like the Möko Takabisha," Ranma interjected hastily. (( And right about now, I’d bet I could even rip off one hell of a Shishi Hokodan. Damnit! This is taking too long! Ryoga . . . ))

"Or the Hiryu Shoten Ha?" Ukyo asked, tipping her head slightly.

"No," Cologne shook her head, poking Ranma with the end of her cane to get his mind back on the present. He growled lowly and moved out of her reach, but renewed his efforts to pay attention.

The Amazon Matriarch continued. "Powerful attacks those may be, but they do not concentrate the ki enough to do the serious damage required. Essentially, the Shikome -are- ki. They will simply laugh off battle aura and power that is released to flail about undirected." Her voice grew very quiet and grave. "Young ones, the only option we have is an attack that compresses all of the projected ki, strength and emotion down into a single controlled focus, a small quick intensified jab at nothing less than lethal strength. It is a technique known as Kokoro Kogatana, the Mind Dagger."

There was silence. Though none of the five teenagers had ever heard of the attack, they all recognized from the grave tone of Cologne’s voice exactly how serious and dangerous this technique was. Looks were exchanged further, as each silently wondered about their readiness to learn something so potentially deadly.

As far as Ranma was concerned, there was no room for doubt or hesitation. He’d forced himself to learn new techniques for reasons far more trivial, he could do no less for his Ryoga. Shampoo was in silent agreement with the pig tailed boy, as was Mousse. Ryoga was one of their own, and they were both willing to do what was necessary to save him, though Mousse would have freely admitted that the Lost Boy really meant very little to him. Amazon pride and honor was what mattered, but the end result would be the same.

Ukyo was rather nervous, but did her best not to show it, plastering a look of cool determination on her face. She actually didn’t know any ki attacks, her art was purely physical. But she was willing if she was capable. Of them all, Akane was the least trained and her jitteriness showed plainly. Though she rarely let it surface, the Tendo girl was not always entirely confident of her abilities, and she had never learned a ki attack either. The thought of starting with something so dangerous scared her.

"I can see that you all understand the graveness of this," Dr. Tofu spoke up after clearing his throat. "And I know that I can trust each of you with the responsibility that knowledge of this technique will impart upon you. Frankly, the idea of teaching it bothers me a great deal, but I have faith in all of you."

Five sets of eyes swung toward Cologne.

"Obaba, you no teach technique?" Shampoo asked, voicing surprise for them all.

"I don’t know the technique, Granddaughter." Cologne smiled slightly as she shrugged. "I have heard of it, of course, but I’ve never seen it used. After speaking with my associate about the means to defeat a Shikome, we both called all over Japan looking for someone who knew the Kokoro Kogatana technique. Imagine my surprise when I was finally referred back to our own Dr. Tofu."

Tofu smiled, blushing a bit and rubbing the back of his neck.

Ranma stared, then blinked. He had forgotten all about the fact that Tofu was not only a top-notch neighborhood physician, but also a Master martial artist, and considering how casual or even silly the doctor sometimes acted, that wasn’t terribly hard to forget. But when he looked at Tofu now, he didn’t see any of the normal good-natured playfulness in the man’s warm eyes. He saw only grave seriousness and determination. Once again forcing down his desire to panic, Ranma turned toward Tofu and bowed respectfully, then looked up at him imploringly.

"Tofu-sensei . . . " he began quietly.

"Of course, Ranma," Tofu nodded understandingly, gesturing for him to stand back. "Everyone watch carefully." The young doctor grounded himself firmly, curling his right hand into a fist and bringing it up in front of him.

It happened quickly, so fast in fact that only Ranma, Shampoo and Cologne were able to see exactly what was going on. Tofu released a battle aura for a split second, and it flared around him like a flame, getting the chance to flicker only once before Tofu barked out the words, "Kokoro Kogatana!" As soon as the phrase was spoken, the battle aura shifted, sliding down and concentrating itself into the doctor’s right arm, disappearing into his body once again.

Barely a second later, a blade of ki ignited from Tofu’s fist, snapping into being like a switchblade. It was about a foot in length and glowed hot lava red, a full concentration of the doctor’s battle aura, ki and emotions.

Everyone took an involuntary step backwards as the humming energy burst into reality. It felt dangerous, and the crackling blade seemed to prickle at their own auras. The effect was almost ticklish, but each teen had the feeling that the sensation could very quickly turn painful if the blade was brought any closer.

"Aiyah," Shampoo muttered, staring wide-eyed.

Tofu held the knife for a moment then opened his hand to release it. The ki shimmered and was absorbed back into his body. "The blade is created from your own ki strength, concentrated and finely focused," he explained quietly. "Which means that you must limit the amount of time you wield it, otherwise you risk draining yourself. But the real power behind it is emotion. It’s the fuel that makes the blade dangerous. With the proper emotion focused down that tightly, an attack with the blade will be lethally effective."

Cologne nodded. "I would like each of you to learn this technique, due to the nature of the enemy we’ll be facing, but realistically only Ranma will have the emotional intensity required to actually kill the Shikome."

Ranma was already itching to try the technique, but concern overrode his urgency for a brief moment. "If I’m the only one who can do it, then why should anyone else even go? I ain’t keen about putting everyone in danger." And for once, Ranma realized, he was actually speaking the truth. In the past he might have faced the danger alone strictly for the sake of his stubborn pride, but everything was different now. Admitting to himself that he loved Ryoga was a critical first step toward a necessary dampening of his ego. This time when he expressed concern, there was no ulterior motive behind it.

"You need someone to back you up, Ran-chan," Ukyo said sensibly.

"You concentrate on the girl, and we’ll take care of peripherals," Mousse added.

"But, there ain’t no peripherals, it’s just Ikioi." the pig tailed youth argued, glancing at Akane. She was the one he was most concerned about, not only because of his own brotherly fondness for her, but because he knew that Ryoga would hate Akane being put into any sort of danger because of this. And, she was the one with the least training and experience.

Akane met his look with one of her own, showing him the determination and pride he was accustomed to seeing in her.

"We don’t know that, Son-in-Law," Cologne continued. "She may have tricks up her sleeves that we have no way of anticipating. There is strength and safety in numbers."

"Very true," Dr. Tofu nodded. "And please remember, the Kokoro Kogatana should never be used against a living adversary. It would have the same result as a real metal blade, with the added effect of completely frying that person’s own ki-system and disrupting the chi terribly. I agreed to teach this only to help Ryoga, because it is sure to be the best weapon you have. Using it against a ki-based creature such as this Shikome, who rely on that energy to sustain themselves, should be quite disastrous."

"Exactly what we want," Ranma growled viciously, his blue eyes lighting up with a rather fanatical pleasure. At last! At last there was some hope, a way to beat the Shikome bitch once and for all and get Ryoga away from her.

Ryoga . . . Ryoga who was still screaming in Ranma’s soul.

The pig tailed boy stepped forward once again, eager to accept Tofu’s training. "Show me how, Tofu-sensei," he requested urgently. "Please, show me how."

****************************************

Reality shunted violently back into place, with a speed and suddenness that tore Ryoga apart as it came to a screeching halt. His body reacted involuntarily, curling into a fetal position on the dusty floor of the hallway, his stomach clenching and causing him to retch . . .

Ikioi was standing above him, somewhere in the darkened shadows of the house, her aquamarine eyes shimmering sadly as she looked down at him. Ryoga coughed and choked, bringing up only a thin trail of clear fluid flecked with blood. As soon as the painful constrictions in his stomach had faded, he let his head fall back against the floor, completely worn out and stretched to the very limits of his sentience.

"Had enough, my Heart?" Ikioi asked, her voice twinkling within his head.

Somewhere, there was anger . . . but Ryoga really couldn’t find it. Nor could he exactly grasp the hate that flickered through him as his mind slowly recalled the attack that had prompted his extended punishment. He dug his fingers against the floor, making tracks in the dust with his nails. The resulting grating sound seemed to come from another place entirely. A world he used to inhabit, but no longer touched. Right now . . . there was only the pain, and the sense of his own fragile mind trying to turn in on itself in an effort to protect him.

Her fingers brushed through his hair, lightly and lovingly. There was gratitude toward her, as he finally began to realize that the torture had actually stopped. Ryoga turned his head ever so slightly and looked up at her, a haunted glaze in his earthen eyes. Never mind that she was the one who hurt him in the first place - she had ended it, and he was willing to do whatever she wanted to avoid experiencing that terrifying agony again. She smiled gently at him, signaling her approval, and he was washed with relief. For right now . . . it was over . . . it was over . . .

"Come, my beautiful beautiful Ryoga," she said softly, bending down to kiss his cheek. The transfer was triggered and he whimpered almost silently in fearful anticipation, but Ikioi pulled back and replaced her perfect lips with a tiny gentle hand. "You must rest and build your strength up again."

The hard floor of the hallway melted away, dissolving itself into a soft comforting material that wrapped around his battered body and cradled him soothingly. Ryoga vaguely recognized the pattern of the material as being that of the spread on his own futon upstairs. He didn’t have the capacity to wonder how he had gotten there, he simply curled gratefully into the offered shelter and closed his eyes wearily.

Ikioi leaned over him, her slender warm body pressing against his, and continued to stroke his hair, speaking gently and lovingly. "Rest my beloved," she whispered. "I’m so sorry that I had to hurt you, but you needed to be taught a lesson. You understand that, don’t you?"

Ryoga shut his eyes a little tighter. From somewhere inside, he heard himself reply that, no - he didn’t understand, and he felt that flicker of hate once again. She had done something to make him angry . . . he remembered that was why he had attacked her . . . but he couldn’t pull the exact reason out of his head. All he could really recall was the excruciating pain and the terror of being unable to do anything to prevent it. Swallowing hard, he nodded and whispered, "Yes . . . I understand . . . " in a hoarse and broken tone.

"Good. Now listen to me very carefully, beautiful Ryoga." She ran her hand down his cheek and neck. "Your soul is mine, but I can feel that your heart no longer belongs to me. This bothers me a great deal, my love, but I understand. I know that I took something very precious away from you . . . something you loved more than your own life, and I am sorry. But you must remember that you are mine, whether your heart is faithful or not."

A shiver tingled through Ryoga’s body, and a low keening wail began in his head, one that reminded him at last of why he had attacked her. (( Shirokuro . . . )) he cried silently. (( My puppy . . . my loyal friend . . . I’m sorry . . . I’m sorry . . . ))

"Understand this, beloved," Ikioi continued, leaning down to breathe her words into his ear. "Disobey me again, and I will hurt you again."

Nightmare memories of that black helpless death swam around him and Ryoga curled tighter into the bed. "No . . . " he pleaded softly.

The girl wasn’t finished. "Rebel against me again, and I will take away the others you care about, just as I took your dog and the puppies," Ikioi told him, her tone light and conversational as she continued to stroke his neck with her delicate fingers. "We will be leaving here very soon, my Heart, tonight you and I will break the Seal and open the way to my realm. But, those who would fight for you may come before we go, and I want you to understand how easily I could kill each and every one of them."

The young man was paralyzed by her words, how cold they seemed even when delivered in a warm and comforting tone. As she continued, his fear grew . . .

"It is as simple as a thought, Ryoga. Your animals I displaced into the sun. They were gone instantly, before they even knew what was happening, and I could do the same to your friends, quite easily." She chuckled softly. "Or, I could choose to send them to far slower deaths. I could displace Akane Tendo into the higher atmosphere and let her fall to her end. Or I could send her to another realm entirely, one without air perhaps, where she would have a few moments of awareness before suffocating."

Disbelieving anger was growing within Ryoga again, along with the fear. She had . . . she had . . . killed his beloved dogs . . . and now she was threatening to do the same to . . . Akane . . . no! Not sweet beautiful Akane!

"And as for Ranma Saotome . . . " Ikioi purred lowly. "I would be very happy to displace him into the deepest pits of Jigoku where the lowest demons could tear him apart at their leisure."

(( Ranma . . . )) Ryoga blinked away furious hot tears, trembling deep inside. Ranma who had warned him against Ikioi, who had tried to make him see and understand how dangerous she was . . .Ranma who said he cared . . .

Ryoga’s blind stupidity had already killed Shirokuro and her puppies, and that knowledge wracked the Lost Boy from the inside out. There was no way that he could bear to be responsible for further horrible deaths. Dearest Akane and Ranma . . . Ranma . . . he still wasn’t sure how he felt toward Ranma . . . but no matter how he felt . . . he could not stand the thought of the pig tailed martial artist dying because of him.

"Please . . . " Ryoga gasped out, his scream-torn throat protesting the passage of sound. He coughed violently for several moments before he was able to get himself back under control. "Please . . . don’t . . . please . . . " Looking up at her, he pleaded with his eyes, with his weak and displaced aura, even with the chi cowering inside her chest. He pleaded with everything he had left. The Lost Boy had already accepted his own fate, so what happened to him no longer mattered. If she wanted his soul, his heart, his body . . . whatever the hell she wanted to take - it was hers, just so long as she didn’t hurt anyone else he cared about. "Please . . . "

Her ocean eyes were warm and soft, and she brushed at his bangs once again, a tender expression on her face. "I won’t, my Heart. If you behave yourself and do as I tell you, I will not kill them, or any of those who are going to try and rescue you."

Any of . . . ? There were others besides Akane and Ranma? Ryoga blinked in bewilderment. And they were coming to rescue him? He didn’t have any friends, no one who really cared about him, so who would be willing to get into the middle of this and help him?

Ikioi tapped his forehead gently to regain his attention. "Do we have a deal, my Heart? You behave, and your friends all live."

Ryoga shut his eyes for a long moment, hurting inside with a pain that was far different than the torture she had inflicted on him earlier. He shoved aside the disgust and hate he now felt for her and found a calm spot of fatal acceptance deep within. For the safety of those who wanted to help him . . . for dear Akane . . . for Ranma . . . Ranma. . . Ranma . . .

"Hai, Ikioi-sama," Ryoga whispered, tipping his head forward in the best bow he was capable of at the moment. "I’m y - yours. And I will behave."

Her smile was angelically beautiful, the type of smile Ryoga would have gladly died to have a pretty girl direct toward him only a week ago. Now he could only shiver deep within and let himself sink into the pit of shame and despair that was opening up inside. As she wrapped herself around him, protectively and warmly, Ryoga looked away and whimpered silently, mourning for not only his lost dogs . . . but for himself as well . . .

"Rest now, beautiful Ryoga," Ikioi’s voice shimmered through his mind. "Sleep. This evening we will break the Seal, and then we will be together forever."

__________________________________________________________________________________

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